Feature: The Big Cock

6 things you only know if you have had sex with someone with a huge penis

From high-fiving to ‘ouch’, having sex with the well-endowed can be V complex.

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1. THAT VEEERRRRY SPECIFIC BRAND OF MILD TERROR…
Unless you’re ‘a Samantha’, the first time you’re faced with a mammoth cock can be so intimidating that you’re temporarily struck down with fear that he’s actually been concealing a large club to whack you over the head with. “What the hell is this thing? It’s bigger than most newborn babies. GET IT AWAY FROM ME.”

2. FOREPLAY HAS NEVER BEEN MORE NECESSARY
When you’re dealing with something that you’re pretty certain is bigger than your forearm, gone are the days of quick poundings with your knickers still halfway down your legs. Instead, this guy has got no choice but to treat foreplay almost as if it’s the main event if he’s even thinking of coming near you with his big mate.


3. ASKING FOR THE EXTRA-LARGE CONDOMS
So you handed him the same regular condoms that many of your past conquests have used before, and he looked at you doubtfully. You rolled your eyes and said: “Yeah you’re big, but I got drunk and put one of these over my head once…” Ninety seconds later the condom is temporarily MIA and your squatting over a mirror trying to find it.

4. LOVING LUBE MORE THAN LIFE
Before he ‘pumps and squirts’ you need to have pre-pump and squirt with the bottle of lube, AKA your best mate. For long sex sessions and multiple bangs a night, lube is like a faithful coach, standing on the sidelines giving you water and Deep Heat at halftime.

 

5. IT ALWAYS HITS THE SPOT
Once you’ve gotten over the morbid fear that he’s somehow going to spear your internal organs and he’s played by the foreplay rules, then you’re pretty much guaranteed to have totally amazing orgasms. With a penis that size it’s impossible not to hit the spot.

6. YOUR FRIENDS LOVE TO TALK ABOUT IT
You’ve had sex with a guy with a massive cock and your mates are congratulating you like you’ve brought home gold. From finding things that compare to the size (deodorant cans, the entire meat section at the supermarket) to having the aubergine in your most used emojis, you frequently riding a big willy brings some kind of joy to everyone.

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Copyright of the writer © 2018 Mark Darcy All rights reserved
SmugcatPublished by Smugcat Media&Publishing
Art: Unknown found on the internet

 

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